This week we've got a big piece in the hopper regarding IMBA's take on freeriding, as well as some news about a few causes worth checking out. But first, let's begin with a completely gratuitous rant...
Christian Adam, setting an important world record.
SILLY WORLD RECORD BROKEN BY SWISS MAN! I'm fairly young, yet I can still recall there being a time when world records meant something. World records used to stand for mighty achievements--jump the Grand Canyon on a moped, walk on water stuff. When Chuck Yeager broke the speed of sound or Evel Knievel broke all the bones in his body while attempting to jump his Harley over 101 double-wide trailers, by golly, you had to lean back and raise a frosty Pabst in salute. No doubt a hundred brave men had died trying to do just that same thing.
- advertisement -
Nowadays, everybody and their pet llama are busy breaking some meaningless world record. Look, I can stuff 23 kosher dill pickles up my yoo-hoo! Hey, I can watch Fox News 74 hours straight without attempting suicide! Whoop-dee-friggin-doo! You call those world records? Please.
There's a difference between a feat that has never been attempted because it is particularly difficult, and a feat that hasn't been attempted because no one gives a shit whether or not it gets done.
Know what I mean? No? Consider the latest world record.
Swiss violin-maker Christian Adam recently set the world record for riding a bicycle backward while playing the violin. Adams cycled backward for 60.45 kilometers while playing Bach on his violin. Adams sat on the handlebar. His music stand was affixed to the bike's saddle.
Now, I'll admit that cycling backwards while playing the violin is impressive. It's impressive in the same way that packing six full-grown circus clowns into a little car is impressive. Sure, I'd fork over a couple of bucks to see it happen, but is it worthy of being canonized in the world-record books? Hardly.
This world record business is really just a regrettable extension of the whole ultra-democracy movement. No, I'm not suggesting that everyone votes too much. We don't have that problem in the United States. Rather, I'm talking about the currently en-vogue idea that every single one of us has some special talent worth sharing with the world. This is simply not true.
We are not all meant to be rock stars (Jessica Simpson) or porn stars (Paris Hilton) or talk show hosts (Regis Philbin). Right now there are millions of tone-deaf Americans who can't convincingly carry the Oscar Mayer Wiener jingle. These people should not be given record contracts. There are millions of slow, dim light-bulb-types who contend that the world is flat and that the Jews are at the root of the problem--these people should not be given tenure at Harvard.
Every parent tells their child that they are special, brilliant and unique. This is a good thing. Kids deserve that much. Somewhere along the road, however, there comes a time when we should sit our children down and explain to them that jumping the Grand Canyon on their Big Wheel is heroic and worthy of a world record, while playing a violin on their big wheel is special...just not world-record-special. Know what I mean? Hey, it's a free country. If you disagree with me, just click on the e-mail link at the top of the page and send me your thoughts.
IMBA & FREERIDING: A MATCH MADE IN HEAVEN? This past week, most of the news on the 'net revolved around race results at Sea Otter, new product from Shimano and so forth. While these are all worthy subjects, another very newsworthy item slipped under the radar of most web sites: the International Mountain Bicycling Association announced that they'd given five mountain bike clubs $500 grants to develop freeride trails.
Think about that for a moment: IMBA giving out grants for freeriding.... To a lot of people, that probably sounds like the Pentagon giving rocket-propelled grenades and claymores to school children. Why would a trail-access organization align itself with a movement that, let's be honest, isn't exactly famous for its "Leave No Trace" ethics? The answer affects us all.
The freeriding grants are actually the brainchild of Kona Bicycles. Kona has long been a staunch supporter of IMBA. This past year, Kona's advocacy guy, Mark Peterson, approached IMBA with a proposal to target funds toward helping mountain bikers develop legal freeride areas. Peterson knew firsthand that freeriding was no longer just a Canadian thing. Florida, Illinois, Maryland, Michigan, North Carolina: these are just a few states experiencing growth in freeride trails. Just about every bike manufacturer is selling a freeride model and yet there are relatively few freeride-style trails that are legal to ride. What happens when bike companies sell people freeride bikes, bike magazines glorify freeriding and yet no one bothers to make legal freeride trails? The most likely answer is trail closures.
To Kona's advocacy director, it just makes sense to invest in making freeriding a more legit segment of mountain biking. "It's really just history repeating itself," Peterson explains. "When mountain bikes first came on the scene, we knew we needed access to trails and that we therefore needed to go through the process of legitimizing our access. The same thing is now happening on the freeride side of things. We haven't been successful in the states in obtaining legal access for this kind of riding and, unfortunately, the result is that we're seeing illegal trialbuilding and stunts that just aren't being built appropriately, which then reflects on our entire industry. A lot of people who aren't riders themselves, and this is true of many land managers, don't see the difference between cross country and downhill and freeriding. As a result, illegal trails and poor construction reflect on the sport as a whole. Some of the gains in access that we've had in the past, we're seeing them get rolled back. At Kona, we knew we had to be proactive about this. That's why we started the Klumps grant program--to provide legitimate access for freeriding. It's about being proactive and improving this situation before it becomes a problem."
Here's the fastest way to bring home the only magazine that takes its readers on a ride. You'll discover the best places to ride, how to get there, and valuable travel tips with Bike Magazine-- at no risk! During this special online offer, you can get a TRIAL ISSUE and receive 7 more (a total of 8 issues) for only $11.97 - you save over $19 off the cover price!
No comments have been added to this entry.
Add Comment